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Mugshot Beauty Contest OOT

by huckfunn ( 58 Comments › )
Filed under Blogmocracy, Humor, OOT, Open thread at May 10th, 2012 - 11:00 pm

Hey, gang. Here’s fun for the whole family. Scroll through this collection of mugshots and see if you can spot any friends or family. Apparently, these critters were all locked up in Orlando, Florida. What would it look like if we had a sample from all 57 states?  Those arrested for resisting arrest are easy to spot. Their eyes are swollen shut and they have numerous facial cuts and contusions. Go figger.

Orlando-area mug shot hall of shame

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58 Responses to “Mugshot Beauty Contest OOT”
( jump to bottom )

  1. 1 | May 10, 2012 11:30 pm

    Gonna be one of those nights eh…


  2. AZfederalist
    2 | May 11, 2012 12:35 am

    Made it to 155, that’s all I could handle.

    #50: Prostitution? Really? What, she was being pimped to blind men?


  3. Will Consult for Food
    3 | May 11, 2012 12:37 am

    I was touched by all those patience stories so here’s one more:

    There was this guy in my office who was a loner and always stealing food from peoples desks. It got to the point where no one would let them near their office. He looked pathetic and hungry one day so I invited him into my office and gave him a whole Snickers bar. He was shocked but grateful as he took it from me. He slowly backed out of my office eating the candy bar with a look of relieved puzzlement.

    The next week he came back and asked me if I had any more Snickers bars. I gave him one I had in the desk and he wolfed it down. I kept a supply of Snickers bars on hand in case he came by and sure enough every week or so he would politely knock on my door and ask if he could have another.

    A few months later there was a terrible commotion in the office. I heard screaming and gunshots so I locked my door and hid in the corner. The screaming and gunshots came closer to my door until with a loud bang the door flew open and the loner was standing in the doorway covered with blood and brandishing a gun. he had an angry look on his face until he saw me- then he smiled a big toothy grin and said with a thumbs up “Snickers!” He passed up my office and continued to rampage through the hallways killing everything that moved.

    (nite all)


  4. 4 | May 11, 2012 12:39 am

    @ Will Consult for Food:

    Wow…


  5. Will Consult for Food
    5 | May 11, 2012 12:43 am

    118 Grand Theft -- broke into a Twinkie warehouse and ate the whole inventory.


  6. Will Consult for Food
    6 | May 11, 2012 12:44 am

    doriangrey wrote:

    @ Will Consult for Food:

    Wow…

    I stole that from some comedian whose name I can’t remember. To this day my kids will walk up to me, give me the thumbs up and say “Snickers!” just to get a laugh.


  7. AZfederalist
    7 | May 11, 2012 12:50 am

    @ Will Consult for Food:

    Hope you are better at consulting than comedy. Or you must be one hungry puppy.

    Can I offer you a Snickers? :twisted:


  8. yenta-fada
    8 | May 11, 2012 1:01 am

    Will Consult for Food wrote:

    doriangrey wrote:
    @ Will Consult for Food:
    Wow…
    I stole that from some comedian whose name I can’t remember. To this day my kids will walk up to me, give me the thumbs up and say “Snickers!” just to get a laugh.

    Is that you, bureaucat?


  9. yenta-fada
    9 | May 11, 2012 1:10 am

    Some of those mugshot people are just trying to improve on nature./


  10. yenta-fada
    10 | May 11, 2012 1:35 am

    Calgary, Alberta has a muslim mayor. I like to check out the Calgary online ‘ask the imam’ site for problems that may plague Canadians:

    My husband likes to do things bahind my back and he lies to much. This year he travelled without telling me and married my brother’s x-wife. It was painful for me because my husband and I are first cousin, so he married his cousin’s wife. When I was back home I used to stay with my sister in law, I used to take her like my sister. They fall in love then sister in law ask for divorce from my brother and married my husband. Now, my husband is back to me, he left us for 4 months without any money. Is it wrong if I ignore him?


  11. yenta-fada
    11 | May 11, 2012 1:36 am

    @ yenta-fada:

    You should see the answers!!!


  12. AZfederalist
    12 | May 11, 2012 1:38 am

    @ yenta-fada:

    Good heavens, I lost track of who was related to whom after about the second sentence. Was expecting it to end in ” … and now I’m my own grandpa”


  13. yenta-fada
    13 | May 11, 2012 1:43 am

    AZfederalist wrote:

    @ yenta-fada:
    Good heavens, I lost track of who was related to whom after about the second sentence. Was expecting it to end in ” … and now I’m my own grandpa”

    Good metaphor, but without the benefit of country music. lol

    There are ‘ask Imam’ online sites all over the world. The answers always run several paragraphs of the wit and wisdom of you know who.
    So, the answers are more confusing than the questions. But they’re just like us (if we were 7th century nomadic cultists, that is.)


  14. lobo91
    14 | May 11, 2012 1:44 am

    @ yenta-fada:

    The interesting part is that she seems to be mostly upset over who he married, not the fact that her husband took off for 4 months and came back with another wife.


  15. yenta-fada
    15 | May 11, 2012 1:48 am

    Here’s one. You get the general idea of the insane questions and answers after the first twenty or so.

    http://www.islam.tc/cgi-bin/askimam/search.pl?query=&limit=40


  16. yenta-fada
    16 | May 11, 2012 1:49 am

    lobo91 wrote:

    @ yenta-fada:
    The interesting part is that she seems to be mostly upset over who he married, not the fact that her husband took off for 4 months and came back with another wife.

    Hi {{lobo}} The fact that these people are always marrying their first cousins does not contribute to the clarity of their thought processes.


  17. lobo91
    17 | May 11, 2012 1:54 am

    @ yenta-fada:

    No kidding.

    I remember the nonsense the left was pushing about 10-15 years ago about birth defects in Iraq, trying to blame them on our use of depleted uranium ammunition during Desert Storm.

    They were actually the result of inbreeding, of course, but you never want to let facts get in the way of bashing the US military.


  18. yenta-fada
    18 | May 11, 2012 1:57 am

    Islam wrote ‘the book’ on control and micromanagement:

    http://www.muslimsofcalgary.ca/data.php?s=6&action=5&id=1736


  19. BatGuano
    19 | May 11, 2012 2:03 am

    I’m waiting for the Eric Holder mug shot.


  20. yenta-fada
    20 | May 11, 2012 2:03 am

    lobo91 wrote:

    @ yenta-fada:
    No kidding.
    I remember the nonsense the left was pushing about 10-15 years ago about birth defects in Iraq, trying to blame them on our use of depleted uranium ammunition during Desert Storm.
    They were actually the result of inbreeding, of course, but you never want to let facts get in the way of bashing the US military.

    You can see why muslims think we are stupid. All of this stuff is completely available to anyone with a computer and some curiousity. The more polite we are, the weaker we look to numbskull predators. All they have to do is breed and scream Islamphobia. Effective, ain’t it?


  21. yenta-fada
    21 | May 11, 2012 2:06 am

    BatGuano wrote:

    I’m waiting for the Eric Holder mug shot.

    Prayers going up. How ya been?


  22. lobo91
    23 | May 11, 2012 2:17 am

    @ yenta-fada:

    The more polite we are, the weaker we look to numbskull predators. All they have to do is breed and scream Islamphobia. Effective, ain’t it?

    Classic assymetric warfare. Use your enemy’s strength against him.


  23. BatGuano
    24 | May 11, 2012 2:19 am

    @ yenta-fada:
    Been very good, thank you. My sock has been more active at the other place than I have been active here, a situation I will change.My wife and I have relocated to another part of Ca, A red part of the state.


  24. yenta-fada
    25 | May 11, 2012 2:21 am

    @ Guggi:

    Nothing like instant muslim RAGE, death threats, and generally acting like vicious children to shut down civilization and debate.
    Late here, goodnight to you and all.


  25. Guggi
    26 | May 11, 2012 2:21 am

    @ BatGuano:

    Hi, BatGuano, did you already quit smoking ?


  26. yenta-fada
    27 | May 11, 2012 2:22 am

    BatGuano wrote:

    @ yenta-fada:
    Been very good, thank you. My sock has been more active at the other place than I have been active here, a situation I will change.My wife and I have relocated to another part of Ca, A red part of the state.

    How nice for you both. It will be great to have you back. Good luck in your new location. :-)


  27. lobo91
    28 | May 11, 2012 2:24 am

    @ yenta-fada:

    Night


  28. yenta-fada
    29 | May 11, 2012 2:25 am

    lobo91 wrote:

    @ yenta-fada:
    The more polite we are, the weaker we look to numbskull predators. All they have to do is breed and scream Islamphobia. Effective, ain’t it?
    Classic assymetric warfare. Use your enemy’s strength against him.

    Yes, the scientific method, the free use of reason and debate, and advanced research are haram with totalitarians.


  29. BatGuano
    30 | May 11, 2012 2:28 am

    @ Guggi:

    My last cigarette (or any tobacco) was on April 11th. Anytime I feel the urge for a cigarette, I take a Commit lozenge.Thank you for asking!
    I’m kicking it this time.


  30. Guggi
    31 | May 11, 2012 2:29 am

    BatGuano wrote:

    @ Guggi:
    My last cigarette (or any tobacco) was on April 11th. Anytime I feel the urge for a cigarette, I take a Commit lozenge.Thank you for asking!
    I’m kicking it this time.

    Congrats !! :-)


  31. BatGuano
    32 | May 11, 2012 2:32 am

    @ yenta-fada:
    Thank you very much! My wife and I are very happy here. Although we did have to move her cats 244 miles south. : )


  32. BatGuano
    33 | May 11, 2012 2:33 am

    @ Guggi:
    Thanks. You guys are the best!


  33. Guggi
    34 | May 11, 2012 2:34 am

    bbl sunbathing is calling for me :-)


  34. BatGuano
    35 | May 11, 2012 2:41 am

    @ Guggi:
    Watch those uv’s snd hsve fun.


  35. BatGuano
    36 | May 11, 2012 2:45 am

    @ BatGuano:
    I’d like to buy several vowels.


  36. Calo
    37 | May 11, 2012 2:50 am

    @ BatGuano:
    Srsly?

    Sum lttrs r ovrrat’d.


  37. BatGuano
    38 | May 11, 2012 2:59 am

    @ Calo:
    It’s late for me. Mst slp nw :)


  38. BatGuano
    39 | May 11, 2012 2:59 am

    Gdngt, ll!


  39. Calo
    40 | May 11, 2012 3:00 am

    @ BatGuano:
    Thunderstorm woke me up for a bit.
    Back to sleep for me too.

    Night Bat


  40. mfhorn
    41 | May 11, 2012 7:18 am

    Dear God what a scary looking bunch of characters.


  41. RIX
    42 | May 11, 2012 7:23 am

    Good morning. Day 1,572 America held hostage!


  42. RIX
    43 | May 11, 2012 7:35 am

    I’m stumped, which one of those mug shots is Iceweasel?


  43. citizen_q
    44 | May 11, 2012 7:41 am

    Good morning all!

    Is is wrong that I kept mentally superimposing my AR’s sight picture over most of those picts?

    Guess I am a social engineer at heart.


  44. mfhorn
    45 | May 11, 2012 7:42 am

    Someone a few days ago had a link to a pic of a truck with an anti-Obama message painted on its tailgate. Anyone know where I might be able to find that again?


  45. citizen_q
    46 | May 11, 2012 7:42 am

    RIX wrote:

    I’m stumped, which one of those mug shots is Iceweasel?

    How many are demoncraps?


  46. MikeA
    48 | May 11, 2012 7:49 am

    @ citizen_q:

    Nah… Use a FN/FAL. Its .308 to make sure they are no longer a problem. After looking at those photos, it reminds me why I own firearms.


  47. RIX
    49 | May 11, 2012 7:50 am

    citizen_q wrote:

    RIX wrote:
    I’m stumped, which one of those mug shots is Iceweasel?
    How many are demoncraps?

    Good morning. Quite a few could be the Weasel.
    So tough to pick the right suspect.


  48. mawskrat
    50 | May 11, 2012 7:52 am

    Good Mornin All…make it a great day!!

    and don’t get a mug shot this week end////


  49. mfhorn
    51 | May 11, 2012 7:52 am

    Since unemployment is dropping due to a shrinking ‘labor force’ created by people losing their unemployment after 99 weeks, maybe the Republicans should propose a 6-9 month extension of benefits. While helping those who are out of work, it’d also show the real size of the problem, and make it harder for Bammy to claim he’s driving unemployment to under 8%.


  50. RIX
    52 | May 11, 2012 7:55 am

    @ mfhorn:
    The Preezy is slow jaming the recovery.
    Slooooooooooooow!


  51. citizen_q
    53 | May 11, 2012 8:03 am

    @ MikeA:
    So true, but I am a small guy. I can carry much more 5.56mm ammo than .308. I have a handy 20″ .308 bolt for those longer shots.

    Have been thinking about a semi .308. So many cool firearms, so little disposable cash….


  52. Guggi
    54 | May 11, 2012 8:05 am

    mfhorn wrote:

    Someone a few days ago had a link to a pic of a truck with an anti-Obama message painted on its tailgate. Anyone know where I might be able to find that again?

    It was a “savage-thread”

    Here some more


  53. mawskrat
    55 | May 11, 2012 8:07 am

    ‘Bomb Mecca’: Military college taught young U.S. officers that ‘Hiroshima-style’ attacks on Islam’s holiest cities were needed to win ‘total war’ with Muslim world

    Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2142634/Join-Forces-Staff-College-taught-officers-wage-Hiroshima-style-war-Muslims.html#ixzz1uYue4pxR

    and what’s wrong with that,,,sounds like a plan to me


  54. lobo91
    56 | May 11, 2012 8:30 am

    @ mawskrat:

    The students at JFSC aren’t “young” officers. It’s equivalent to the what the Army used to call Command and General Staff College (now known as Intermediate Level Education, or ILE). It’s for majors and lieutenant colonels.


  55. 57 | May 11, 2012 10:14 am

    mawskrat wrote:

    ‘Bomb Mecca’: Military college taught young U.S. officers that ‘Hiroshima-style’ attacks on Islam’s holiest cities were needed to win ‘total war’ with Muslim world
    Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2142634/Join-Forces-Staff-College-taught-officers-wage-Hiroshima-style-war-Muslims.html#ixzz1uYue4pxR
    and what’s wrong with that,,,sounds like a plan to me

    More importantly, it is actually one of “The Belmont Club’s” three conjunctures“.

    Conjecture 2: Attaining WMDs will destroy Islam

    This fixity of malice was recognized in President Bush’s West Point address in the summer of 2002, when he concluded that “deterrence — the promise of massive retaliation against nations — means nothing against shadowy terrorist networks with no nation or citizens to defend.” The enemy was equally indifferent to inducement or threat. Neither making nice — Jimmy Carter’s withdrawal from Iran, Reagan’s abandonment of Lebanon, Bush’s defense of Saudi Arabia, Clinton’s rescue of Albanian Muslims from Serbian genocide, the payment of billions in aid to Egypt and Pakistan — nor the gravest of threats would alter the enemy’s intent to utterly destroy and enslave America. Allah had condemned America. The Faithful only had to find the means to carry out the execution.

    Because capability is the sole variable of interest in the war against terrorism, the greater the Islamic strike capability becomes, the stronger the response will be. An unrepeatable attack with a stolen WMD weapon would elicit a different response from one arising from a capability to strike on a sustained and repetitive basis. The riposte to an unrepeatable attack would be limited. However, suppose Pakistan or North Korea engineered a reliable plutonium weapon that could be built to one-point safety in any machine shop with a minimum of skill, giving Islamic terrorists the means to repeatedly attack America indefinitely. Under these circumstances, there would no incentive to retaliate proportionately. The WMD exchange would escalate uncontrollably until Islam was destroyed.

    Consider a case where Islamic terrorists obliterate a city, causing five times the deaths at Hiroshima and an American limited response.
    Iteration Non-Islamic Losses Islamic Losses
    1 - 5 x 10^5 -2 x 10^6
    Total - 5 x 10^5 -2 x 10^6

    In a war between nations, the conflict might stop at this point. But since there is no one with whom to negotiate a peace and no inclination to stop anyhow, the Islamic terrorists will continue while they have the capability and the cycle of destruction continues.
    Iteration Non-Islamic Losses Islamic Losses
    1 - 5 x 10^5 -2 x 10^6
    2 - 1 x 10^6 -5 x 10^6
    3 - 5 x 10^6 -1.5 x 10^7
    4 - 8 x 10^6 -3.0 x 10^7
    5 - 1.5 x 10^7 -5.0 x 10^7
    Total - 2.95 x 10^7 -10.2 x 10^7

    At this point, a United States choked with corpses could still not negotiate an end to hostilities or deter further attacks. There would be no one to call on the Red Telephone, even to surrender to. In fact, there exists no competent Islamic authority, no supreme imam who could stop a jihad on behalf of the whole Muslim world. Even if the terror chiefs could somehow be contacted in this apocalyptic scenario and persuaded to bury the hatchet, the lack of command and control imposed by the cell structure would prevent them from reining in their minions. Due to the fixity of intent, attacks would continue for as long as capability remained. Under these circumstances, any American government would eventually be compelled by public desperation to finish the exchange by entering -1 x 10^9 in the final right hand column: total retaliatory extermination.
    Iteration Non-Islamic Losses Islamic Losses
    1 - 5 x 10^5 -2 x 10^6
    2 - 1 x 10^6 -5 x 10^6
    3 - 5 x 10^6 -1.5 x 10^7
    4 - 8 x 10^6 -3.0 x 10^7
    5 - 1.5 x 10^7 -5.0 x 10^7
    6 0 -8.93 x 10^8
    Total - 2.95 x 10^7 -1 x 10^9

    The so-called strengths of Islamic terrorism: fanatical intent; lack of a centralized leadership; absence of a final authority and cellular structure guarantee uncontrollable escalation once the nuclear threshold is crossed. Therefore the ‘rational’ American response to the initiation of terrorist WMD attack would be all out retaliation from the outset.
    Iteration Non-Islamic Losses Islamic Losses
    1 - 5 x 10^5 -1 x 10^9
    Total - 5 x 10^5 -1 x 10^9

    James Lileks and the Pew respondents would not lose America; but like the boogeyman in Seven, Islam would take it’s soul. The most startling result of this analysis is that a catastrophic outcome for Islam is guaranteed whether America retaliates or not. Even if the President decided to let all Americans die to expiate their historical guilt, why would Islamic terrorists stop after that? They would move on to Europe and Asia until finally China, Russia, Japan, India or Israel, none of them squeamish, wrote -1 x 10^9 in the final right hand column. They too would be prisoners of the same dynamic, and they too have weapons of mass destruction.

    Even if Islam killed every non-Muslim on earth they would almost certainly continue to kill each other with their new-found weaponry. Revenge bombings between rival groups and wars between different Islamic factions are the recurring theme of history. Long before 3,000 New Yorkers died on September 11, Iraq and Iran killed 500,000 Muslims between them. The greatest threat to Muslims is radical Islam; and the greatest threat of all is a radical Islam armed with weapons of mass destruction.


  56. Will Consult for Food
    58 | May 11, 2012 12:38 pm

    yenta-fada wrote:

    Will Consult for Food wrote:

    doriangrey wrote:
    @ Will Consult for Food:
    Wow…
    I stole that from some comedian whose name I can’t remember. To this day my kids will walk up to me, give me the thumbs up and say “Snickers!” just to get a laugh.

    Is that you, bureaucat?

    Yeah -- I got laid off from the gubermint so now I’m taking my show on the road and hoping to make a living.


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